Saturday, 13 December 2014

ANNOYING THINGS PEOPLE DO TO READERS




I really lose my patience with people when it comes to reading. 

We all have those friends who don't read, family members, or even random people in public that nag at us about our books. I'm sure you know who they are. We also know those readers who are pretentious or judgmental. It gets to that point when you just want to hit them over the head with a book and tell them to go away. Sadly we can't always do that and we have to put up with it. 

You might read this and end up going '
Oh God, yes! I hate these people' or even say that you have your own. Share your thoughts in the comments if you recognize any of the types listed below.

So behold, a list of the most annoying people who won't leave us alone when we're reading or trying to have an intelligent conversation about a book. 




1. The 'Lying reader' guy.


I don't know how many of you have come across these people but we have. They say that they read when in actuality they don't. My friend told me once that she'd read Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows so I was like 'Really?' and asked her something about the book. Nope, she knew nothing. Don't lie to a Potterhead about Harry Potter, it won't work, oh no, you will be found out. And that goes for any book, really! They're missing out so they might as well read it.





2. The 'reading over your shoulder' guy


Look, mate, I'm sorry that you didn't bring a book because you don't read, but don't read my book over my shoulder! It's your own fault that you can't play Candy Crush on your phone anymore because the battery died, stop breathing down my neck and coughing in my ear. I got this a lot when I used to take the bus, I do specifically remember a time when this woman was heavy breathing in my ear and trying to read my book, and I was too emotional because it was a sad part in the book, so I pretty much had my back to the side of the bus to stop her from looking. Please stop. Besides, I don't want to smell what you've had for lunch... if you like reading so much, go get your own book.



If you're that interested, just ask me about it then go get your own copy! 



3. The 'judgemental' guy


'You're reading that? It's romance, so it's like 50 Shades of Grey? It's not a classic though, is it? It's not Shakespeare. It sounds really lame-' SHUT UP. I won't judge your book choices if you don't judge mine. Why do people feel that they need to comment on your choice of story? It's all about taste. If I want to read a romance book, I will. If I want to read a smutty book, I will. If I want to read a YA/kids book, I bloody well will. Do not judge me. I'm personally not a fan of classics but I won't scoff at anyone because they are, that's their decision. These people need a heavy book to the head.




Fuck you, I won't read what you tell me!


4. The 'anti-book' guy


You know those people who don't read and can't understand why you spend so much money and time on books? Yeah, them. I love reading, of course I'm going to spend a lot of my money on them, they make me happy. I know a lot of people who waste money on video games or getting a new phone every few months. The thing is, I don't judge them on that because that's their decision, if they love phones then that's their choice. But I enjoy spending hours going through the bookshop, picking out new stories and holding books, smelling them, arranging them on my bookshelf. So, anti-book guy, don't you go telling me to not buy books. Books are life! Sadly they also mention that we read too much - you can't read too much, I don't see the problem in reading. It's actually very healthy for you, in so many ways. Go read a book, mate.




What do you even do in your spare time? I don't understand. What do you even talk about?


5. The 'book borrower'/'book destroyer' guy


This segment is dedicated to my destroyed copy of Mockingjay that I lent to my brother's girlfriend a long time a go. R.I.P.

After that painful experience, I've never lent out a book since. Never ever give people your books, they always come back months later or never at all, and if they do give it back, it's battered, ripped, folded pages, food/drink marks, water damaged or faded. Why. You should be treating it with respect. If I'm lending you a book, it's because I trust you. You ruin that, you ruin that trust. If I asked them to look after my phone for a week and they gave it back with a cracked screen and the battery not working, I'd expect that they'd be upset just as much as me. But if it's a book? 'Oh that's alright, i'll just get you a new copy, it's only like 5 quid'. Uh okay, but where is said book? I still haven't got a new copy of Mockingjay yet and it's been 3 years. I'm not exaggerating. No more books for you! I'm not a library, go to a real one.




6. The 'book hipster' guy


Oh, you read The Hunger Games before they cast Jennifer Lawrence? Oh you read this book the day it was published before it got big? DO YOU WANT A TROPHY? Nobody cares. I've seen this so many times, they're looking at me as if I've only just discovered how electricity works. 'Where have you been for the last-' 'Gee, I don't know, maybe reading other things? Go away!'
I want to hit that guy. But when it's reversed and I've actually read something before them 'Yeah but it's not that good' or 'Ugh get over it'. OH OKAY. Snob.


Please stop talking.


7. The 'Movies' guy


I think this one is very common. 'Why read the book when you can watch the movie? It's quicker!' ... And you're saying this to someone who reads? No. The movies are never as good and at the end of the film, you always end up asking me about one or two things that weren't explained properly. My response? 'It's in the book, go read it'.



lawd give me strength

8. The 'talking' guy


If I'm reading, do not talk to me. I'm in the process of moving out of my family home and at the moment, I can't read in any public areas of the house because of people constantly talking to me when I'm reading or noise. An exciting bit is about to happen and then - BAM. Someone will ask you a question or mention something unimportant. The same thing goes for when you're at work, relaxing in the staff room and all of a sudden, a flurry of people will emerge and just won't... stop... talking...!






9. The 'spoilers' guy

So you're sitting there, happily reading your book and that guy walks over and decides to be a complete a-hole and asks if I'm enjoying it. I nod, still engrossed. And then... he says that dreaded line 'You do know that ___ dies, right?'. OH NO YOU DIDN'T! Are you sure you wanted to risk your own life my spoiling the book I'm reading? And I'm also going to mention those people who feel it's a good idea to spoil on the internet, which is more common. My co-blogger got spoiled for Allegiant by someone posting a picture of a page from it and saying it was from one of the earlier books. Nope. A huge, big fat spoiler right there. 


10. The 'you read too much' guy

There's no such thing as reading to much. Well, not to me anyway. I don't always want to go out, sometimes I love staying in and reading, relaxing with a warm drink and going on an adventure with these characters. You always get that person who says that I need to stop reading so much and do things. How about no? Besides, I am doing things, I'm reading. It's usually people who don't understand how amazing reading is. Non-readers. What do they do in their spare time? Leave me and my book in peace.


11. The 'haven't you already read this one hundred times?' guy

Of course I want to re-read my favourite books, you numpty. Don't judge me because I want to re-visit Hogwarts or want to see Kellan Kyle again. The books aren't there to be read just once, that's the beauty of it, I can go back and see them all again. Once I'm in love with a world or a character, I'll want to see them again. I don't mind if people re-read the same books and don't read anything else, as long as they're reading. It's when people who don't read say this to me.







Do you know of any annoying people who interrupt your reading mojo? Let us know, I can guarentee that we've met one of these people. Leave us a comment or share your 'annoying people' via Twitter!

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